Precious Thoughts

As I'm sitting here eating the remainder of the enchilada meat and watching TV, my head is trying to find it's way around, through, up, over and under all the thoughts that are running through my head after watching the movie Precious a bit earlier this evening. To say that it was intense, well, it isn't exactly the right word. So I went to my thesarus and looked up the word intense to see if I could find a more appropriate word: consuming, emotional, fervent, profound, vehement, and many more. There still are no words better so I'll just classify it as such: intense!

If you decide to go see it, just be warned of it's intensity. Though it's "profound" by nature, and some of the themes are difficult for some people to sit through, I do suggest that those who can stomach it go to see it.

That out of the way, I'm moving on from the intensity of the themes to the intensity of the characters and the actors who portrayed them. Of this, I am led to blog about. I have a very big appreciation right now for the art of acting/performance. People who decide to do this for a living and have to portray such overwhelming characters - often opposite of who they are themselves in "real life" - deserve a huge amount of respect and admiration for their craft, whether they get millions for it or a few hundred dollars. The performances on the screen tonight were so brilliant and had to cause the persons portraying the characters a large amount of physical, emotional, mental and even spiritual work. In particularly, I am personally impressed with the work of Monique, who was mother to Precious...though the term mother should be loosely used towards her character.

The gift that Monique, and others in her chosen profession, possess is incredible. I know some people out there may not see it as "work" or maybe even as a "fluff" profession. What I believe is that I know if I had to do what Monique did in that movie, well, I would fail miserably. I could not be able to stomach it or myself. In fact, as my friend was driving us home on the snowy streets of Bloomington, I told her that I'd have to go home everyday and take a shower to wash the character off of me and attempt to wash her out of my mind in the process.

That got me to thinking how many of us have such overwhelming gifts that we're either using or squandering. Though I thoroughly hated the character, I love Monique even more now. I appreciate her gift, her craft. And I think about what I love to do and what I want to do with that and how my gift can affect others like theirs affects me.

I've always known that one of my gifts is that of imagination. I can imagine almost anything, good and bad. In traumatic times, my imagination can be pretty volatile - down right intense, to use one of the words of the evening. In positive times, it is uplifting and creative and inspires. But I think that a lot of us, me included and maybe even whoever you are that is reading this, tend to focus on the intense, volatile times...and sometimes we just can't get past it so we stay in the same patterns that we've always been in.

Tonight, I was reminded again that we are to be who we are and we are to do the best with what we've been given - not to take advantage of it. I know that I have to also appreciate the status in life that I've been given. Real or not, Precious had a much rougher life than I ever had or maybe will ever have. The mere fact that I sit where I'm sitting right now and am writing on this laptop, while the TV is on, a half a glass a wine six inches from my typing fingers and a comfy couch makes me pretty lucky compared to Precious' situation. I for one don't want to take advantage of what I've been given...and have just made a new goal for myself: by this time next year, I will be successful in some of my goals and in the process of being successful in the rest.

That is an I WILL, not an I HOPE. For I want to be like Precious, too.