6.25.2009

Happiness & Vanity

Hmmm....sounds like a good title for a novel huh? Working on that...really. But that's all you get for now. Presently, it's a good title for my blog entry tonight.

I should be in bed but I just can't sleep without writing something. Tonight I just need to write about the day. I'll skip the work day...it was normal. Afterwards, it was normal too but different, too. I was happy in a way I haven't been in awhile. Certain things that usually bother me weren't. I wasn't focusing all my energy on negative things...I was even dancing in my car and a friend walked by to see it and then facebooked me later about it...very cool. He said that I looked like I was having fun...and that I sounded happy. I had to think for a second and then I realized that I am happy. I'm not ecstatic or super excited but I am happy. I don't have everything figured out or have been able to make a few decisions yet...but I'm happy, content to just be me right now. I really haven't felt that way in awhile...and I wasn't even noticing it! A friend did and I'm so glad that he did. Thanks, Friend! :-)

I hate to say it but I think a little of this happiness is about vanity. I've lost six pounds in 7 days on my new diet. I started the workout portion tonight and a few items of clothes are truly fitting better. Tomorrow I start to add more good carbs into my diet and do just a bit more of exercise. I feel so much better with all the crappy foods out of my system. But I'm a girl so it's nice to see your clothes fitting better and your looking better. It's vanity; I know it. Still, it's nice to feel good and look good. There's nothing wrong with that really. It's natural; and it's not going to my head so that's a good thing. :-)

But as I type this, I'm proud of myself for the discipline that it's taken. It isn't easy for anyone to do anything like this. A lot of people take for granted that they can be disciplined in a lot of areas of their life. I'm not one of those. It's hard. And one of the hardest things for me, a self-proclaimed cook, is eating right and not always making the fatty comfort foods...and consuming them!!!! So, I'm very proud of my discipline right now and that I'm sticking to it...tomorrow marks day 9. Hopefully by day 28, I'll be at least 10 lbs. lighter, toner, and my body (and all that is in it) happier for giving it the right foods at the right times in the right doses.

Our body is a temple...and God wants it to stay that way. He also wants me to feed my soul and spend time with Him. But I didn't for very long today. I know that I'll go and pray now (and probably fall asleep as I'm doing it) but tomorrow I need to take more time than I did today to spend with Him. I need to get back to my good habits of spending solitary time with my Lord. My Jesus. I've been a little lax in the last few days. I need to keep that discipline, too.

But, you know, it's just coming to me that God has answered or is beginning to answer some of my prayers today. I'm happy, content and calm and I haven't felt those ways in awhile. I don't care about the stupid things that go on around me. I just don't. It's an awesome feeling...not to let the little things get to me finally. So nice to have that stress out of my life....and I'm going to keep it there.

Anyway, it's really time for me to go to bed...I still have to pray for my peeps and for this Amazing God that we serve. :-)

No comments: